Spode Says, "You Are the Bane of my Existence!" That's a Good Thing, Right?

She didn't sound totally happy when she said it, so I'm not quite sure...

I dunno.  I thought I was pretty adorable when she came to see me.

I heard you liked the Budweiser Clyde ad this year.  I'm just trying to show off some of my own cute antics!

Spode promptly covered up my eyes again.  The kid can't take a hint. I pity her future students.

She should be happy, anyway.  When she came to visit last night I was wearing my mask like she told me to.  As a reward, I didn't have to wear it in the barn.  Oh yeah!

Ahhh. My beautiful face can get some air!

Surprisingly, I also got a mask break today because she wanted to check my vision.  This was because I ran smack dab into the mounting block yesterday.  It's true, I didn't see it.  After today though, Spode is pretty sure that I was just not being careful and failed to look where I was going.  Gimme a break! It's pretty tough on a horse to have one eye out of commission.  That's half my field of vision! Not like you human folk.

Anyway, I didn't tell Spode I could see because I knew she wouldn't let me have my mask off if I did.  

First, the usual paranoid gaze into my eyes.  Hate to disappoint Spode, but I'm no better than last week.  Still a blue haze in each eye, I'm afraid. 

After Spode gave up on staring at me, she got down to grooming me.  Most exciting part? I'm shedding!!! 

More reliable than a groundhog by far.  Take comfort from this picture: spring is coming!

After an extra long curry combing to get rid of my hair, lucky me got to run around in the arena naked! Oh Happy Day. I can see! 

I don't even know what to do with myself! I'm just gonna stand here and see what I can see, Old Sport!

Fine, if you insist...

Seriously, this could be a Budweiser commercial in itself.  Except I don't think beer can be associated with finally seeing clearly... 

Mostly I just soaked up my nakedness and being allowed to do whatever I liked while Spode watched me carefully for blind spots. None to be seen, although I admit my left eye does look strange for some reason.  I dunno.  I feel fine, promise.

Actually, at this moment I feel better than fine.

Spode was having a bit of a rough day so I got to play for an extra long time, though a lot of consisted of following her around like a puppy while she tried to trick me.  It led to lots of hugs, kisses, and treats.  Just my kind of day!

I'm going to catch you!

We also started to learn voice commands to prepare for whatever might happen in the future.  "Step up" and "duck".  "Duck" is a personal favourite--one she thought was important to learn for a potentially blind horse my size.  All I have to do is drop my head down and Spode gives me a treat.  Easy peasy.  "Step up" I don't quite understand.  She seems to say it randomly and I haven't made any connections yet.  Still thinking (but not too hard--it's the weekend, after all).

After we finished playing, Spode put me back out (with my mask-rats!) and brought Striker in to ride. I was sure to keep my mask on at least while she was still in the vicinity.  I know when not to push my luck.  It was a good idea, because I got treats just for being adorable when she brought Striker back out.

Look at me! I'm still bug-like, so give me all you got in those pockets!

Seriously, I'm putting on my cutest face here...

Oh wait, I lied. THIS is my cutest face! (Or I'm teasing you with the fact that as soon as I see you drive away, this blasted thing is coming off. Stat. You decide.) Based on the gigantic handful of treats this got me, I'd say this use of tongue was effective.

Until later, Old Sports.

Jay.

Gatsby 1, Spode 0

Oh boy was I in trouble yesterday. Spode arrived to find me naked, and was most displeased.  I tried to make it up to her by running over to see her, but she flounced past my cute face to go mask hunting in the snow.  Much to my dismay, she found it half buried near the tree. She put it back on me right away and gave me a firm scolding (complete with finger pointing!) about being out in the sun without my protection. Yeah yeah.  Spode's lectures are never really that good at getting the point across because she still gave me my treats after she finished talking. Win for me!

Yes, I am very bad and I'll be sorry if I damage my eyes even more.  Now can you open your hand up for me please?

Once inside, Spode spent a verrrrrry long time staring at my pupils and wondering if she could find a way to measure how blue my eyes are from one day to the next (newsflash: you can't). Once she had frustrated herself over that and given up, she decided it was time to get back to work and continue on with our training. Ok, my training.

I haven't practised wearing a saddle since Thanksgiving, but Spode decided to just throw one on me and see how I reacted.  I didn't.  Just stood still and waited.  In all honesty, I decided Spode needed some sign that I was not going to cause her trouble forever.  I can be good sometimes, I swear.  So I stood still while she put the saddle on and tightened the belt. No problem.  Then it was off to play in the arena.

Do I really need to run today? I don't care about the saddle. Promise. 

Spode asked me to run around anyway to make sure I didn't mind the saddle making noises or anything.  Trotted and cantered with nary a buck or kick.  Again, Spode was pleased. The only problem with not caring is Spode takes it as a sign for the next step in the training process.  So today the stirrups came down.  Spode says her feet will go in these one day, so I need to get used to that.  I'll admit to being a little wary at first, but those things aren't so bad.  Once you know they're hanging down, you stop flinching when they touch you.  They sort of get into a rhythm.

The life of a horse is truly ridiculous sometimes. And I am not sure I like this part of it. 

After Spode was sure I was totally relaxed about the stirrups, she tried something else new.

The world from Spode's perspective.  This is at her eye level. She should be taking pictures from my eye level! 

Spode was looking at my back a lot yesterday, and eventually she just couldn't resist practising leading me up to the mounting block and standing next to me.  After a while, she leaned over, let her arms hang over the saddle, and put some weight on my back.  I didn't budge (I also didn't blink an eye, but of core she didn't see that...).  Cue a very pleased Spode! The lost mask incident was finally forgotten and forgiven! Best of all, Spode says that was plenty learned for one day, and so back to the barn we went for treats and cuddles. Good, because I was pretty tired. Incredible to think how much I've learned over the past 6 months.  I miss the good old days sometimes.  You know, back when I was a foal...

*yawn* Eat and sleep and sleep and eat! Those were the days...

Still, back when I was a wee babe I didn't get all the attention I get now, so I wouldn't say I want to go back to that time.  Nah. It's all right around here.  Spode can just be a little annoying sometimes with her persistence.  After drying my special mask by the stove to make the velcro stick better, back on it went with more lectures about how much it cost (pfft, like I care!) and how much it would help my eyes and vision. Tell that to Senator.  Come on, Spode, you know it was him...

I'm innocent, I tell you. Innocent! Treats?

With a kiss and a cookie, Spode was gone before I knew it.  The countdown to Thursday has begun.  It would be the prefect opportunity to get rid of my mask and bury it somewhere great, but Spode has 2 spares and people checking up on me to make sure I'm following orders. Oy.  She's no fun.

Until later, Old Sports.

Jay.

Great, mum. Now I'm going to look like a bug for the rest of my life...

Oh my god.  I look ridiculous, Old Sports! Utterly ridiculous. Spode woke me up in the morning with breakfast, medication (argh), and a stupid looking mask.  I prefer my old one, which made me look like a pirate.  I'd rather be a pirate than a bug any day.

Pirate me:

Bug me (read: you bug me):

Are you actually leaving me out here like this? But I'll be bullied! They'll call me four eyes!

This mask also makes everything darker, which is going to take some getting used to.  Right now I'm still blindfolded on my right side, which is still very annoying.  Actually everything is very annoying, but I am outside again!! I only had to stay in for brekkie today.  Awesome.

Are we going back out yet? Now? Now??

Spode was going to make me do some work today, but the barn was way too busy so I just got to go to my freedom again. 

Ok, you got your photo.  Please take it off now?

Spode left me to ride Striker, who no longer has to wear his mask.  Lucky devil. Maybe he'll take mine off for me...If not, Senator will definitely do it.  Maybe I'll wait a day or two so Spode doesn't go bonkers though. Pretty sure she's gone bonkers at the moment though.  She introduced me to horsey cartoons today in order to explain her feelings.

Sheesh, you're telling me! Stop going over me with a fine tooth comb!

Ha! Story of my life! 

I take the cartoons as a good sign--the first step is admitting you have a problem. 

Anyway, after Spode brought Striker back I came to her to beg for the mask to be removed.  That was when she informed me that I had better get used to it, because this mask is a permanent fixture from now on.  Yeah.  I'll have a surprised, bug-like expression on my face forever and always. 

Well, Old Sports? What do you do when you've just been told you have to wear the human equivalent of a bag over your head forever? You own it. 

I'm gorgeous.  I'm a model.  I'm a new-age, jazz-age gentleman. I'm the epitome of Equine GQ.  A hipster.  In the words of Nick Carraway, I'm worth the whole damn bunch put together.  Just try and call me Four Eyes or The Bug!

Yeah, I got this look.  Thank goodness I'm handsome enough to pull this off.  My cutely crooked blaze is still visible.  That's all I need, really. 

Tomorrow is a work day, and Spode and I are gonna get back on track with training.  Ground driving is out while I'm blind on one side, but I think we'll practice with the saddle.  More clothes!

Until later, Old Sports.

Jay. 

Vet Visit #2: Both Eyes Now

You read that right, Old Sports. It's spread to my other eye.  Vet came out today and just before she arrived, Spode took off my mask to reveal a blue uveitis haze in each.  Alas.

On the plus side, my pupils are responding to light changes a little better so I don't have to have my eye messed with quite so many times a day.  Just twice a day now, but it's both eyes so it still feels like a lot to me.

Spode was not very happy to hear the news, especially since the spreading means it's very likely that I have the recurrent form of the disease.  The vet thinks I've had it for a long time but have not shown outward signs until recently.  Don't ask me, I don't know either.  I just know that it's all a bit hazy right now.

I'm scheduled to see Mrs. Vet again in 2 weeks to re-evaluate a second time.  She and Spode talked about surgical implants and that's a possibility down the road if it happens again and everyone's 100% sure that it's recurrent.  Have to make sure there's a vet who's willing to do it first, but Mrs. Vet was pretty sure some French place I couldn't pronounce would do it.  And sooner rather than later.  There's no guarantee it would stop the blindness from coming on, but apparently it has slowed the process down for many horses.  All sounds a bit scary to me, Old Sports, but whatever the humans say.

And that's the news for today.  I was finally allowed back out with my buddies, but everyone is watching me closely to make sure I don't get hurt still being blindfolded on one side, and if either eye gets worse it's back on stall rest for me.  I sure hope not! Tomorrow I get my new uveitis mask for the first time.  I needed a pirate eye patch put on it first, but as soon as the sun comes up, Spode is bringing it out to me. I'm sure she'll take pictures.  I've heard it looks very silly...  No pictures of me today because Spode's fingers were too cold to de-glove (such a whiner).

So here's one from before.  Positive thoughts, Old Sports!

 Jay.

Another Weekend Come and Gone...

And it was a weekend of battles lost and won.  I needed a longer one, in truth.  Thursday had better get here quick.  Spode had a firm discussion with me on Saturday and we spent an hour working on my manners.  Not very fun for me, and all I got out of the end of it was a romp in the arena.

First, she disrupted my snack time.

Likits are delicious--why didn't you feed these to me sooner?

Then we went to the crossties and Spode cracked down on my fidgeting, pawing, and threatening to kick.  It was a very long session.  By the end of it, I was standing still like I used to and being a very good horse while she braided my mane, but I wasn't thrilled about it.  Still, there was lots of treats in it for me, and that's always a good thing.  Plus, after standing still for so long, Spode let me into the arena.  I didn't really feel like running around, so mostly I just walked with a bit of trotting.

You do know it's my bedtime, right?

Can we stop now so I can get back to my likit?

Spode seemed to be ignoring me and was waiting to see if I bumped into things so she could decide whether I should be allowed out into the herd or not.  After hitting my head, the answer is a firm no.  I did go and look out of the window to assure her I wasn't completely blind, but she still says no, I have to wait until my blindfold comes off so I don't get hurt in the field. I won't be able to see Tyr pin his ears and tell me to move, which could be very bad I suppose...

What can you see out there, Old Sport?

So back to my stall I went.  Spode and I wrestled for a while to put the steroids in my eye, and she won that eventually.  Then we called it a night.

The next day, I had visitors and I forgot everything Spode and I worked on yesterday.  I didn't threaten to kick anyone, but I was walking all over her and fidgeting like crazy.  We were both frustrated, and eventually she let me into the arena.  For the first time this weekend, I let my crazies out.  SO FUN! I bucked and bucked and bucked and bucked some more.  Lots of galloping and hopping all over the place while Spode and her friends tried to make sure they stayed out of my way.  That felt real good.  I only hit my head once, so I'm getting better at knowing my sight limits too. It was good for all of us, but I wish I didn't have to wait until Thursday to do it again. I can't wait to be on regular turnout again. I know that will help my relationship with Spode and I'll remember that I have to stand still and respect personal space.  For now, I'm off the hook because it's just too damn hard to be still and cooped up all the time.  I'm just a wee boy (in age, not size).  I can't control myself!

I'm lucky Spode still loves me... It's because I'm so adorable, no doubt.

I've still got whoa down pat! Be happy! How could you be frustrated with this face? Even a mask can't hide my cuteness.

Until Thursday, Old Sports.

Jay. 

"Love is Blindness"--Oh sorry, is it too soon?

Spode says it is.  But I'm not Spode, so here goes:
Jack White's Love is Blindness--The Great Gatsby

Anyway, even if Spode says it's too soon because she's still freaking out about the possibilities of my eye condition, the song can apply to her because she's the one blinding me.  Love, right? She didn't dress me up like a pirate for nothing...

Arrr, me hearties! I mean, arrr, my old sports!

Yeah, so let's back up a bit.  I've been inside for a week because I have Uveitis.  Yeah, that scary thing.  But hold your horses! (If you've got 'em).  Spode jumps to the worst possibility sometimes.  I'm okay! Who knows what's going to happen so let's all just take a calm, deep breath... 

My own reaction to the diagnosis? "Well $&*#!!" Hey, don't blame me.  I don't have a horse to hold! 

Last Wednesday, my eye was cloudy and bluish, I was squinting because the light was hurting my eyes, and I had a tear running down my face.  I was a sad Gatsby.  One week later, I can now open my eye and there's no more swelling, but the blush haze is still there.  That means I have another round of steroids and eye drops to go through. The worst. Almost as bad as being stuck inside for a week! I'm so bored. And I cam running into things because of Spode's blindfold. 

On the plus side, I got this delicious Likit.  In fact, I got two of them.  Demolished them both in record time!  You could call me a likit expert at this point! But the truth is, I'd rather be outside.  It's stressing me out, and I've lost some weight. My shoulder muscle is aching from sleeping on it and not moving around much.  I need to get back out! But I have to wait just a bit longer.  There are too many horses in my field and I'd probably wind up getting hurt with my eye patch.  Spode is thinking that I can start by going out at night though, when there are just 3 of them out there.  Maybe even tomorrow! For now I'm enjoying spending several hours in my pen, which is about 3 times the size of my stall. And it's OUTSIDE, which makes it ten times better than the stall!

Freedom, baby! Well, kind of...not really...

I have a pretty strict routine now.  Medication all the time, it seems.  And it's awful stuff! They tie me to a post and then just go right for my eyeball! Pull down my eye lid, drop in some liquid, and then smear this cream along the inside of my eye lid! ABUSE! But yeah, it's for my own good, I know, I know, I know.  (Also, carrots!)

My buddy Striker has joined the medication party, but he gets way less than me and still gets to go outside.  He's masked like me, but doesn't have to be a pirate...

Hi! Welcome home, Spode! Want to join me down here for some Cuddle Time? YES!
 

Yeah, Striker was all cuddly cuddly with Spode when she got back.  Me? I tried to kick her.  This is love, baby! Spode was very angry.  I'll admit, I've never even threatened to do that before, but can you really blame me? I've been cooped up all week! I'm going crazy! Spode was very cross anyway and I got severely reprimanded, but then she let me go a bit crazy.

Why have you imprisoned me here?! Why I oughta....

This is what I think of this whole situation!

Oh good! You got the message!

Yeah, yeah! I got this extension!

And a pirouette for good measure! Half blind, not bad!

Ah, that felt good! After I had my fill of playing around, Spode and I went for a long walk.  It was great.  I didn't try to kick her after that.  I just smiled...

Freedom feels so good!

Thanks so much! I'm looking' at you, Spode! (Wait, am I?) 

Right now I'm back in my stall trying not to complain too much.  Got a Spode filled day ahead of me, and lots of carrots.  My eye doesn't hurt me so much anymore, and I am truly thankful for that.  Counting down the days till Mrs. Vet comes again to tell me I'm okay (we allll hope!)

Until later, Old Sports.

One-Eyed Jay.

Gatsby's Great Escape: Episode 2

Phew, Spode has gone back to school! Thank goodness, 'cause I need a break! I tried to tell her in my own way yesterday. Did she listen? No.  She was back out today and she brought along a small child (oh god, children are terrifying!!).  It wasn't too bad, all she did was brush me, but still.  I have had a long enough holiday at this point. I know she just wanted to say good bye because she's back at school for two weeks straight.  I also know it's just going to take two days before I'm pining for her at the gate.  Ah well.  What can you do.  Queen's should rework its schedule based on my needs.  Gatsby's friend Meyer Wolfsheim could have done it, I bet.  And Spode is a "Wolff" so....

Anyway, back to yesterday.  I had a bit of a wild rumpus. I'm blaming it on Spode.  In the words of my beloved Daisy, "Oh, you want too much!"  We did lots of stuff.  First, she started grooming me.  But just as I was getting into the curry combing, the arena was open so we went in and did some running.

It started out calm

La la la, all is good.

Can we stop now?

But Spode wanted me to run a bit more, so then my sillies came out.  See? Her fault.

Ahh! A wall out of nowhere!

Levade?

After that, we headed back to the barn to finish the grooming, and then she turfed me out into the paddock and brought Striker in instead.  Just as I was settling into eating my hay and chillaxing with the boys, Spode brought me back in and made me play pony again. Ugh.  I was a bit grumpy about that. I got over it after a few minutes though and just did what was asked of me.  Then it was back to the barn and she took pictures of my feet.  Are you kidding me!? Ugh! That was the last straw.  Spode needed a sign. 

Yes, I know.  The cracks I've had forever are finally growing down and are no longer at the coronet band.  Woohoo!

Yes, the back one too.  I know it's exciting, but you need to control yourself and let me outside now. 

It just so happened that as I was thinking that, the barn manager was getting ready to put a round bale out in the field.  Aha!  Now's my chance! Spode must have been reading my mind though. She headed my way to make sure I didn't escape through the gate.  Well let me tell you, Old Sport.  I'm a lot bigger than Spode, and her hand waving doesn't scare me one bit. I managed to get all the horses being silly and tearing around the paddock, getting in the way of tractors... everything you can think of.  Then it was my time.  I made a bee line for the gate just as the tractor was exiting the paddock.  Bingo! Spode made a wild grab for me, but I was gone.  I cantered away and then laughed as Spode ran for the halter.  Now, although I'm a self-proclaimed smarty pants, I didn't actually think about what to do after I escaped.  I slowed down to a walk and then just avoided Spode.  Eventually I just didn't know what else to do though, so I turned around and came to her.  I scared her enough.  I think she got the message.  Well, or so I thought until today.  Sigh. 

So, are you just going to give me a treat and let me out, or...?

Oh rats. 

Until later, Old Sports.  I'm on holiday. Zzzzz

Jay.