Gatsby's Tip of the Day.

Spode was trying hard to be calm when she came to see me this evening, but I could tell she was frustrated about something.  She said, "Oh Gatsby.  Please be good today. I don't want another fight."  Hmm.  Yeah, she was serious.  I put my head down and smelled her.  Calmer already.  Ok.  Here's my tip: know when you can be silly and get away with it, and know when your owner is serious and tired! Yep, I decided there would be no silliness today at all.  My gift to Spode.  Just this once...

So I put my head in the halter, which I hardly ever do.  I like to make Spode stretch her arms.  She works for therapeutic riding and I know she makes her riders stretch--only fair to make her do it too!
But no stretching today.  Break time for her.

I led nicely to the barn, turned around and stood in the cross ties.  Then I did something really special for her.  She picked up my first foot easily, and when she put it down, guess what I did... I lifted up my next foot before she even asked for it.  Ta da! Spode's day was made. She was so excited.  Once again, I must stress how silly and simple minded humans are.  Can you imagine a horse getting so excited about lifting a leg?  No, you cannot.  It's called horse sense for a reason.

Anyway, so Spode rubbed me all over and fed me treats galore (talk about a win-win). I lifted up each hoof before she asked for it and voila! Spode's stress dissipated.

Well, most of it.  I have a bump on my black leg (my thoroughbred leg?) and Spode is worried about it.  She thinks it might be what she calls a splint.  It actually made her pace.  See? I told you she's a crazy thoroughbred at heart!  But there's nothing we can do and she knows that.  Perhaps that's what bothered her.  She calmed down eventually, hoping that maybe it isn't a splint.  Hmm, we'll see.  I don't know what it is either.

I decided to make her happy again by standing still for fly spraying.  Yep, I sure know how to win a girl's heart.  Spode has been rather frustrated because I let her friend Breanna do it when she was here, but I haven't let her since.  Today was the day.  Yeah, I'm a good horse.  It was another win-win.  More treats for me.

She pat me lots and put my pink ear suit back on, and let me back out.  All I can say is, don't get used to it, Spode.  When you're not feeling so tired and frustrated by other horses' behaviour, I'll be back to my silly self.  She'll appreciate that just as much, I'm sure.

 Until later, Old Sports.

Jay.

Pedicures, Spa Days, and Now Different Coloured Shirts!

“I’ve got a man in England who buys me clothes. He sends over a selection of things at the beginning of each season, spring and fall.” (Chapter 5!)

I'm as pampered as my namesake now.  I had a pedicure today.  Hmm, I wonder if Fitzgerald's Gatsby ever had one of those? Must have. 

Anyway, it was quite scary.  The guy came in and pat me but he smelled like...feet.  It was a little weird.  Then he brought in all these metal things.  He had a stand that I didn't like.  It was big and looked sharp.  No thanks.  I wanted a pedicure, not an amputation!

The foot fairy's name (or is farrier?) was Jesse.  He was gentle but persistent and wouldn't let me lean all my weight on him so I can get my foot back.  It works on Spode because she's not so strong, but the foot fairy is a lot better at it than Spode.  He won.  He clipped off my toes but that was all I would let him do in the front.  He kept trying to get my foot forward so he could use a big nail file on me, but I said no.  He tried for a while but eventually he said he didn't want to stress me too much so we should try it again next time.  Spode promised to work on having my foot up and forward.  Oh joy, another thing to look forward to.

Anyway, so Spode was slightly disappointed that my feet weren't made beautiful right away, but she was pleased with my behaviour.  They are much better! The foot fairy will be out again in 4 weeks to try and get them better and correct my deformed hind feet.

Before

Before

Before

After

After

Right Hind After

Left Hind After

Front Left After

 Ahhh.  Feels so much better.  The foot fairy said that aside from the strange way my feet have grown with no care or attention, I have very good quality hooves.  They're big, strong, and healthy looking.  Just what we want.  I can thank my clyde side for my feet!!

Spode! Get over here and clean up this mess!

Ok, so that was my pedicure.  After that I tried on some clothes. First, what Spode called a saddle pad.  She threw it all over me: my neck, my head, my butt, and then my back.  Silly girl.  I was a little worried at first but relaxed when I realized Spode was doing her usual silly stuff.  She likes dressing me up, it seems.

Ok, I don't care.  Now can you please take it off until next year?

 Next up was a blanket, which was much scarier.  I backed up to the end of the barn as soon as Spode brought it out, but she kept following me around until I stood.  I still wouldn't let her get it on my back so eventually she gave in and put me in my stall.  Then I knew I had no choice but to stand still while she threw it on.  I was fine with that, and she told me I was silly.  Yeah, we both have each other figured out, I guess.  It's my colour, so I eventually agreed to wear it.  We'll go with that.  It was hot and it might a funny scratchy sound when I moved.  Still, not a big deal.  I just hope I don't have to wear it too much! I've heard that my Spode is addicted to blankets...

The Green Light is all around me!

Spode took me out to eat some grass in a different paddock.  I was scared of a noise in a tree coming from something I couldn't see.  I ripped the rope right out of Spode's hand and took off.  She was not happy with me.  I shouldn't have done that.  It just meant that she spent 20 minutes making me stand perfectly still with my butt to the scary stuff.  More work.  Sigh.  Also, I learned that she is pretty fast and can keep up with me at the canter for short periods of time.  Yeah, I tried the same stunt and that time she refused to let go so ran beside me.  Twice. She's a determined little person.

I had one more change of clothes after that.  My pink flannel suit.  Er, fly mask.  For reference, this is my namesake wearing his famous pink rag of a suit.

My car is pretty sweet looking too, isn't it?

Mr. Gatsby himself. Yeah, baby. 

So, Spode says she was in the store and she spied this little number, and she couldn't resist...

Pink? Really? Ok, well if Fitzgerald's Gatsby can pull it off, so can I.

Yeah, the GQ editors will be lining up to get some of this.

All in all, a busy and eventful day.  I feel like a clothes horse, but a fashionable one.

Until later, Old Sports.

Jay. 
  

Spode's Gone! Quick, Let's Throw a Party!

It was my first weekend home alone, and I had a grand old time without my mum around.

Let's see...

On Friday, mum came over for about 5 minutes and all she did was give me treats and hug me and kiss me.  Spode was sad for some reason, so she chatted to me about some things I didn't understand, hugged me thank you and said, "See Gatsby?  This is why I have you.  Good job earning your keep!"  She arrived teary eyed and left with a smile.  Job done, I guess.  If all I have to do to make her happy is stand still, I've really landed on my feet at this place! Only time will tell.

Unfortunately, my weekend started out a little rough.  Dinner was late because my feeder was late and had forgotten that Spode left her in charge.  I was a little bit grumbly, but hey: better late than never.

Merlin and I partied hard in the evening.  He likes the jazz.  We got along well, and our Yellow Cocktail Music could be heard for miles. I'm doing Fitzgerald proud, Old Sport.

On Saturday I had a real adventure.  A new horse arrived, and he smelled a little scary.  He's a black stallion named Brother Willie.  I'm a little afraid of him.  I'm glad he's 3 paddocks down from me.  Or so I thought... He jumped two fences to get with Alex and Merlin, and he was headed for me next.  I really missed Spode then!!! A guy came and rescued me by taking me to the sand ring away from Will, but I was scared.  I wanted my Spode to know it was okay.  No one else has done anything else with me, so it was a very new experience.

After Will was caught and locked in the barn, I was led back out to my home.  What a day.

Today was okay.  In the afternoon Spode came back and was very confused when she saw that someone had left my halter on and I was covered in sandy mud from the ring.  I was also still feeling a bit anxious, so I didn't come running up to see her like usual.  Cue Spode's anxiety (I can feel it!).  I let her know I was okay though when she came out to sit in the paddock with me.  We just chilled out for a while, and it was nice:

Ah, reunited at last.   One day without Spode was pretty eventful.  She said it was a good warm up for the fall when she has to go back for learnin' English.

Glad to have her back.

Until Later, Old Sports.

Jay.

"He's as Healthy as a Horse!"

What a silly thing for a vet to say.  I could have told him that. Yep, the vet was here today.  I loved him because he fed me tons of treats! Way more than Spode EVER gives me (which is saying something, I guess, because the horses tell me Spode is a horse spoiler like no other).

Mr. Vet said that he wants to make the early vet days as positive as possible.  Fine by me.  Taking my temperature kind of sucked, but the treats made up for it.  Spode and Mr. Vet discussed my feet.  Mr. Vet checked them out and said he's not at all worried about my front ones, despite a long thin crack in my white one.  My back ones worry him a little because of a "flare crack" but he hopes Mr. Farrier can get on top of it without shoes (shoes? huh?).  Told Spode not to worry...but I could feel that that didn't help her much!

Speaking of worry, Spode also asked him to check my eyes again, even though the last vet checked them and gave me the all clear.  Surprise, surprise, my eyes are still fine. So I got a flashlight shined in my eyeballs for no reason at all.  Sigh... this is the life I've gotten myself into.  I have a worrywart for an owner.  I bet if she was a horse, she'd be a crazy pacing/weaving Thoroughbred...  She needs some Clyde to calm her down.  Oh. Hey.

Mr. Vet had nothing but nice things to say about me.  My ego is growing by the day.  I really sucked up to him--I put my head in his arms at one point.  Yeah, everyone loves Gatsby.  There will be line ups to attend my parties! The yellow cocktail music is coming.
The vet and Spode did confuse me a bit talking about "breaking".  Breaking what? Me??  Why do they want to break me!? The vet rubbed my spine and pat me hard all over and said "I bet you could climb up right now, if you wanted to.  Although I'm not sure how you'd get up there..." to which Spode replied, "I'm waiting another year and a half, at least..."  WHAT THE HECK ARE THEY TALKING ABOUT!?  I'm going to have to have a chat with my next door neighbour:

Hey Merlin, did they break you, too?

Anyway, the vet wished her luck with...whatever it is Spode is planning.   I'll figure it out sometime.  In other news, Spode was super happy with me and with how good I've been with my feet.  She's going away this weekend.  That means not having to pick up my feet or be sprayed (woooo!) but it also means no extra food or attention, which I love.  I come running over for attention all the time! It makes Spode happy and it makes me happy--a win-win. 

Until later, Old Sports.

Jay.

Treats are Tasty, Thumbs are Not

Here I've been thinking Spode has been trying to poison me with those food stuffs she holds in her hands (especially the long orange ones), when in actual fact... THEY ARE DELICIOUS!  I love them now. I love them so much, in fact, that I walked on to the big metal box the other day to get them! This metal box was different than the one I arrived in.  This one was narrow and had a black ramp that made noise and moved.  It was scary, but boy, those treats are good!

I did have one mouthful that wasn't tasty though.  I bit down on something fleshy and Spode made a funny noise (not that that's unusual...).  Well, turns out it was her thumb.  I spit it out.  Blech.  Treats: tasty. Human: gross. I have to be more careful of what I put in my mouth!

Aside from that we have been having some good days.  The big metal box wasn't a big deal after I got used to the ramp.  I'm also letting Spode touch my feet and brush them out.  I'm pretty good at balancing when she works on my right side, but when she touches my black hoof I can't hold it for very long without almost falling.  I just don't want her to touch my black leg, really.  I mean, seriously--it's already changed colour once.  Who knows what might change next!? It could fall off!

Now that I know how good treats are, though, perhaps I'll let her have my feet more often.  She keeps telling me that I have to get good because the "farrier" has to come out.  I'm not sure what that's all about.  According to her, my feet are a mess.  I like them just fine.  I can't see the bottom of them though, so maybe she's onto something...

 Egads!! 

Fine.  Maybe I have a problem... It's Spode's clip job! 

Tomorrow the vet is coming back though, so first things first.  I need another "shot" to prevent me from frothing at the mouth and becoming psychotic.  Hmmm, yes, I think a shot might be a good idea.  So long as I get treats afterwards. *cough, cough*  

Until later, Old Sports.

Jay. 

According to Gatsby's "General Resolves" one should "Bath Every Other Day".

You know what, Old Sport? Humans are crazy (my apologies if you are one).  You know what Spode did to me the other day? She soaked me in water and white foamy stuff for no reason at all.  Did I tell her I wanted a bath?  No. No I did not. And even when I protested, she told me to cut it out and continued anyway!? Who's the boss around here anyway? She named me the Great Gatsby for a reason, didn't she?  Nominative determinism and all that. 

The nice thing about the bath, however, was that I got to do this afterwards, which was sweet:

And I was all clean afterwards.  Two years worth of dirt gone.  I can wear my pink suit any day now! It's on order, right Spode?

"Oh my god! My knee spot is clean!"

So in sum, I have mixed feelings about baths:

I know I'm clean and cute but you, Spode, crossed the line!

Until later, Old Sports.

Jay

"I’m going to tell you something about my life . . . I don’t want you to get a wrong idea of me from all these stories you hear.”

"Back, Gatsby. Back."

That's what Spode says.  And I agree, but I don't mean moving my feet back, like she does.  I need to back up and tell you about my life so far.

So.  From the beginning.
I was born in Richmond at Eveningside Farm, a cattle and heavy horse/horse trading place.  It was a homely beginning.  I got lots of love but--lucky me--I never had to learn any skills except for wearing a halter on occasion.  I got plenty of adoration from neighbours, who called me either Prince or Charlie depending on who was calling.

Me as a baby:

Yeah, that's right, I had 4 white legs.  Baby fur is awesome.  Now I have three white legs and a black leg with a lucky spot (consider it my medal for valour extraordinaire!).  I've always been a bit special...

I grew up with an assortment of horses and ponies through the years, most recently with my buddy Prince (yes, we were all called Prince).  He's also a TB/Clyde, and I considered him my big brother even though we aren't related.  I miss him.

 Spode came to see me one day in June and I followed her around, which she seemed to enjoy.  When she tried to lead me though, I put my foot down (literally).  Had to teach her who's boss from the beginning, you know?

Spode left and I didn't hear from her again for a while, but one morning, on June 26th, I woke up and was led onto a big metal box.  It smelt like horses so I figured it was safe.  Unfortunately it was all a trick.  As soon as I got on, the box was shut and I was trapped.  Foiled! Even worse, the box started to move and shake! A terrifying day.  When the box opened again, I was somewhere completely new:

Thankfully there were other horses there.  I wanted to talk to everyone but they didn't seem too interested in me.  Sheesh, they didn't know what they were missing!

Spode arrived--what a surprise! Another lady came with her who she called "the vet".  She smelled funny and she kept trying to touch me which I didn't like.  She checked me all over and said there were no problems.  Well god, I could have told her that! No one ever asks me...

I had to run around a bit for them (fine by me!) and then my old owner left and Spode was all mine.  She led me to my new field beside a horse named Harold.  He reminded me a bit of Prince, so I took an immediate shine to him.  No, you can't repeat the past, but you can come damn close.

And that's that, Old Sport.  I have been living with Spode for a little over three weeks.  It's all a blur. I still remember hanging out with all my buddies at the old place.  Wasn't too long ago that I was just a wee colt. A nobody from the midwest.  I had no idea that I would one day become The Great Gatsby.

Until later, Old Sports.

Jay.

Well I am a Literary Horse, after all...

I've been living a new life as Jay Gatsby for three weeks now, and I think it's time to get serious.  I've decided this Spode kid ain't so bad so I think I'll keep her around.  Might as well settle into the old literary thing and work on my writing since that's what she's in to.  As such, I think you'll find me quite eloquent for a mere two-year-old. Of course, in your human years, I'd be around 13 and since Spode's mission in life is to teach teens how to read and write, it's no wonder I'm learning so fast. I guess those Fitzgerald quotations help too.

For a wannabe teacher, Spode has a lot to learn, that's for sure.  But she's trying so I'm more tolerant letting her be around me now.  My main problem is that she thinks SHE should get to decide what I eat, when I should walk, when I should stand still, and when I should allow her to spray me with that awful bottle of corrosive flesh eating chemicals (or "fly spray" as she calls it).  Oh, she'll learn.

Today was quite eventful.  Spode came running up saying something about a "tornado" and said I would have to come inside.  I love checking out the barn so that was a-ok.  I don't even try to climb the walls of my bedroom anymore.  As soon as she brought me and all of my friends in it started to pour.  I watched the rain come down and contemplated my namesake's episode in the rain, when he finally met Daisy.  If there's one thing Spode has taught me, it's that Fitzgerald is always applicable.

Anyway, I let Spode brush me and then she said "Ok Jay, let's try something new today."  She showed me a big orange snaky-looking thing and told me not to chew it, or I'd be quite shocked at the result (then she giggled, and I have no idea why). She attached another snaky-looking black thing to it, which had a sharp bit at the end. That was all right, but then she said "here we go..." and the sharp bit suddenly buzzed and started moving! And then she had the gall to try and bring that Vibrating Teeth of Death Machine close to me! Spode kept telling me that they were "just clippers, so take a load off, silly" but I disagreed. I resisted for about ten minutes, but when she did manage to touch me with them, I found out they weren't so bad.  Actually the vibration was quite pleasant.  She gave me a feather massage and I fell asleep.  Sort of a stress-be-gone machine.  When I woke up I also saw that it was a feathers-be-gone machine too, but I don't mind.

Alas, there was more stress today.  Spode decided to feed me and my buddies inside today, which I haven't experienced before.  I love my food, so I followed her to the corner of my bedroom and tried to stick my nose in the bowl.  Unfortunately, my "noggin is too big" (again, Spode's words. I would never be so rude).  I just wanted the food, but instead she left the bedroom without giving me anything! Oh god I was mad.  I stomped and I kicked the wall and I threw my head demanding that she feed me NOW. And what did Spode do? Feed me? Oh, no. Instead she slapped me!  She kept pointing to a black thing on the wall and saying "HERE!" but I just kept checking her hands.  She sighed and left my room again, returning with the tasty brown sugary stuff.  She put some in the black thing on the wall and it smelled soooo good that I had to check it out.  What did I find? Dinner! It was in the black wall thing the whole time! Ahh, that hit the spot.

I forgave Spode after that and we went outside and said good night to each other.  Never a dull moment with that kid, I swear.

Until later, Old Sports.

Jay