Gatsby's General Resolves/ Resolutions

Listen up, Old Sports.  Everyone turn to page 138 of your novels.  Now, who can tell me the significance of my friend Owl Eyes? What's this? You don't have your books with you? Did you even bring a pencil to class!? My god, pull yourselves together-I won't put up with this laziness and ill-preparedness any longer!!!

Oh, sorry--I forget myself.  I fall more and more into Spode's teacheriness every day.  She really rubs off on me.  Though I am much more strict than Spode is.  As if she would ever say that to a student! Nah, she's Ms. Wolff the Nice, and I don't think she has it in her to yell at a kid.  If how much she lets me walk all over her is any indication, the kids probably do the same (though hopefully with less slobber).  Sigh, I'll probably be wishing I didn't say that later.  I'm sure Spode will go into another lecture about her teaching philosophy and her ideals of respecting students and knowing them all personally and never talking to them as if they're beneath you... She's rather idealist, my Spode.  And in truth, it does seem to work out for her.  If it didn't, I don't think she would still be working with teenagers in schools whenever possible.

Sheesh, look at me getting off topic (also something I picked up from Spode's teaching practice, no doubt!) Back to page 138...

Don't be fooled by the big note about Owl Eyes (yeesh, don't get Spode started on him! The girl's obsessed with that character! Not as obsessed as she is with my namesake, of course, but pretty close!)  No, instead focus on Gatsby's list of General Resolves. It's New Year's Eve today, and I'm coming up with my first ever New Year's Resolutions.  Gatsby's are great, so I'll use his list as inspiration for mine.

Hehem.

Pay attention to the green light, kids!

No wasting time at the gate waiting for dinner/Spode.  I spend hours there, and all to no avail.  Spode will come when she comes, there's no rhyme or reason to her time of arrival.  Sometimes it's at 8 am, sometimes it's at 7pm.  I might as well just play around with the other horses.  And dinner? Well that's always at 4pm, but I sometimes hope that they'll feel pity on me and feed me early if I put on my cute face.  Alas, it has never worked.  I think it's time to kick the habit.

No more chewing...Spode! Or lead ropes, or jackets, or Christmas decorations, or anything else other than my bit and the hay.  Phew.  This is gonna be a tough one, Old Sports.  It's not my fault, I'm teething! My teeth are falling out and new ones are coming in. It's so nice to have a good chew on something, especially my lead.  And Christmas decorations are actually delicious. In my defence, I've never actually bitten Spode, but I do like to use my lips on her.  She's told me I need to stop that baby habit, so we'll see what the new year brings!

Stand relatively still for bathing. I do this sometimes, but the goal for the new year is to do it all the time.  I know Spode will appreciate this one! And I'm sure I'll get plenty of treats for it.  Plus, I do like to keep my stockings clean.  One should always do one's laundry...and do it well.

Read one improving book. Period. Considering how literature obsessed my mum is, I do not read very often.  I'll try to read at least ONE book this year! Whether it's Dressage 101 or a classical work of Shakespeare.  I don't know which it will be yet.  I'll do a book club segment on which ever I choose!

Save money in vet bills. Easier said than done, Old Sports! This is a tough one! My eye is still not %100, so that might just be the first bill of the year already.... I'll try, Spode, but no guarantees.

Be better to mum.  That means stop pawing, stop biting, stop taking Spode for walks, and stop pushing her with my head. That'll prevent the guilt Gatsby himself felt, I'm sure.


That's a wrap, Old Sports! Spode told me her only New Year's Resolution is to be a little bit more firm with me and less forthcoming with food.  Isn't that terrible!? No offence, mum, but you suck at this resolution thing.  It's supposed to make you a better person. Your resolutions are doing just the opposite, if you want my humble opinion.

Regardless though, I am looking forward to closing the door on 2013 and opening 2014.  2013 was a bit of a rough year for both of us--me because I was suddenly uprooted from my life and everything changed.  Don't get me wrong, I appreciate it now, but it was stressful nonetheless. Very stressful.  2014, on the other hand, is laid out before me perfectly, and I know I'm sticking with Spode.  Wonderful!

Until next year, Old Sports!

Jay.